Mindfulness in Relationships

mindfulness in relationships

Today, I want to talk about mindfulness in relationships. It doesn’t matter what type of a relationship it is, from romantic to platonic. Mindfulness matters. So what is mindfulness? According to the dictionary, it’s “the state of being aware or conscious of something.” 

In relationships, mindfulness is very important. Let’s break down a few different types of relationships as it relates to mindfulness.

Mindfulness in Relationships for Parent/Child:

This relationship is by far the most important. It shapes who we are, even as adults. The relationship between a parent and child is a special one for a lot of reasons. The dynamic of this particular relationship can be tough to navigate when it comes to being mindful. 

As the child, we are taught that the parent is the overseer and for the most part, at least when we are younger that’s true. The issues usually start in young adulthood when the child is starting to become even more independent. Sometimes parents can forget that growth is a huge part of the process of becoming adults. This is where mindfulness in relationships comes into play here. It comes down to respect, and that respect has to go both ways. 

For the child, they need to understand that in most cases, the parent is doing what they believe is best for them. For the parent, they need to be aware and conscious of the fact that the child is growing up. Conversely, the child needs to understand that the parent still has at least some sway over what happens, until they reach the age of majority. 

In the end, mindfulness here comes down to respect that is earned by BOTH parties. It also comes down to building trust, and with that, each person will hopefully become more mindful and conscious of the other.

Mindfulness in Relationships with Friends:

Friends are another special relationship. From the time of our childhood, we try to connect with others on a purely platonic level. That means seeking out those that vibe with us. These relationships need to have an air of mindfulness to them as well. 

What I mean is that the friends need to be able to be open, honest, and forthright with each other. A great way to practice mindfulness in this relationship is to really listen when a friend is talking. That may mean not talking, but also being there if they need help. As with other relationships, this goes both ways. If one friend is giving more than the other, it creates a lack of mindfulness for the other. It’s a two-way street. 

When it comes to friends, finding ways to be mindful of each other in meaningful ways is important. This could mean not taking sides in an argument if you have mutual friends, hearing each other out during a disagreement, and most of all, trying to remember that neither of you is perfect. You’re each going to mess this up. That’s okay. Try and forgive each other and move forward. If the issue is too hard to forgive or forget, be mindful of that and just realize that things have changed. Be kind to one another, and to yourselves. 

Romantic:

The last topic I wanted to cover when it comes to mindfulness in relationships is romantic. We all want to have love in our lives. I’m not saying that there isn’t love in the other two relationships we’ve covered today. There is, and that’s wonderful, but love in a romantic sense is different and therefore, it’s a different type of mindfulness. I want to break this down into a couple of subtopics. 

Everyday Romantic Mindfulness

What’s meant by this is the daily ways we can be mindful in our romantic relationships. This could be as simple as a hug at the end of a long day or doing one of the house chores that your partner may usually do. Think of maybe cooking a meal, or doing the laundry. By doing something like this, you’re showing your partner that you want to help them, and have an equal partnership where you both acknowledge and share all aspects of your life together. It could even mean letting your partner rest while you cook dinner and then clean up after, simply because they had a long day.

As you can see, the smallest gestures can go a long way. It’s like that old saying goes, “actions speak louder than words.”

Romantic Mindfulness for Intimacy

Intimacy is one of the cornerstones of any healthy romantic relationship. As such, mindfulness plays a special role in it. 

Intimacy can take many forms, from simple cuddling to more physical forms. The trick is to be open to communicating with your partner, listen to their needs, and respect those needs. As with any relationship, it goes both ways. For example, if you know your partner doesn’t like to be touched in a certain area of the body, be mindful when you’re cuddling. If you know your partner likes a certain sexual activity, try and be mindful to incorporate that into the encounter. 

When it comes to intimacy, being conscious, or mindful of your AND your partner’s needs and desires is key. 

Are you going to get it right all the time? The short answer is no, and that’s okay. No one is perfect and you need to be willing to grant each other grace and love, in your relationship. This holds true not just in intimate times, but across all parts of the relationship. 

I’m no expert here. This piece is coming right from the heart, and from my own experiences on these three levels. 

Conclusion

Mindfulness in relationships isn’t always easy. It takes work, no matter what type of relationship it is. The key is that all parties are willing to do that work. If one or more is not willing to step up to the plate, then there needs to be something that changes. It’s not always easy, and as we said earlier in the article, mistakes will happen. We’re human. Just know that it’s okay, as long as you acknowledge and are mindful that a mistake was made. I hope this was helpful for you, and I wish you health in all your relationships. 

Here is a wonderful and short YouTube video that talks about 3 Simple Ways to Strengthen Your Relationships. It got me thinking!

I invite you to check out the link to my podcast on the Products and Resources Page. I cover many other topics on there. Until next time, be well and namaste!

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